life lately

things seem to be going so fast and slow at the same time.
my mission is coming up so soon, but i still have so much to do!
i’m trying to sublease my apartment and i think i finally found someone who can take it! i’m extremely relieved about that!
this month seems crazy, so much traveling and driving and to-do’s.

and then there’s sonny. i don’t even know where to start.
i’ve been getting these little nudges from the Holy Spirit that i need to talk to him about our relationship status. i ignored it for a little while, then i got the prompting to reread my Patriarchal Blessing, and if that wasn’t a slap from God then i don’t know what is.
it specifically talks about my dating life saying, and i knew the moment i read it that i wasn’t supposed to be with him. i need to date other people and do whatever it is that i need to do. i’m not sure if we’ll be together again or not, it is so hard going from planning my whole life with someone, to only being friends. but i know that’s what i need to do.
then i went to the temple, with the question of ‘what in the world am i supposed to do?!’
and i received my answer, loud and clear. 
it isn’t our time. it’s my time. i’ll be leaving for my mission soon and i need to focus on that and maybe go on a few dates here and there. 
who knows what’s going to happen, i moved to orlando for some reason and maybe i just don’t know that reason yet. it’s so hard to really even say these things but i know that these decisions are so much easier when i have the Lord on my side. 
i am so thankful for the temple and being able to receive personal revelation. whatever happens, i know that i will be so happy and blessed. and i know that even though this is hard for both of us, sonny will be so happy also. Heavenly Father won’t make it so we are miserable or unhappy, this decision came from the Spirit so i know it’s what’s best.



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